Santa Announces Mass Layoff Effective Immediately

From the A.P. desk, 7:04am December 26, 2012

A spokesman for Santa Claus has announced a layoff of 50% of his elite elves workforce, effective immediately. The total workforce, estimated at approximately 7,000 little people has worked for Mr. & Mrs. Claus for generations. Mr. Claus said “When I first started in this business, there were only 25 Elves. “ As the world’s population grew, so did the elf population at the North Pole.   In fact, the elf population grew at a rate 3X the regular population rate, probably attributable to a lot of time off during the year, as well as having to spend a lot of time indoors due to the harsh North Pole winters.”

The spokesman, Hans Claus, said “1000 of the 3500 laid off workers will be retrained to work in a top-secret state-of-the-art factory and/or distribution center that are currently being built in an undisclosed location in the North Pole.  The elves will be trained in the latest robotic manufacturing technologies, as well as logistics. A special group of elves are training to implement the delivery of presents via the latest laser guided drone technology in order address the increased delivery demand.  If successful, the drone program will insure Christmas deliveries well into the next century.”

Mr. Claus said “I have an obligation to ensure the long-term viability of the Claus family business.” If this program is successful, I anticipate a productivity assessment of the rest of the organization in 2014. We are just following trends that are all too obvious in the rest of the world’s economy.

The permanently laid off elves will 2500 elves be given 12 month’s pay, a discretionary retraining expense account to help migrate to another industry, and a generous travel expense allowance to move their families to a new location.

Jesse Jackson and Al Sharpton are holding a press conference at noon today in Chicago to protest this mass re-organization of the Claus family business. “A boycott of the Claus business is not anticipated”, said Mr. Jackson’s spokesperson.

Egypt: Is Obama going to make the same mistake twice?

It is disappointing that President Obama has not come out firmly in favor of the tens of thousands of Egyptians demonstrating against the Muslim Brotherhood regime under Egyptian President Morsi. The Muslim Brotherhood promised Obama that they would not run a candidate for President because of the fact that the Brotherhood was the only organized party and legitimate political competition representing the Egyptian people did not have time to organize and develop. The Brotherhood reneged on their promise and Obama turned a blind eye. Now the brotherhood, under Morsi, has made a move to institutionalize Shiria law in Egypt and rig the political system so that the Brotherhood will have control of the congress and Judiciary. This is not democracy and Obama should be standing up and verbally supporting western educated Egyptians, secular Egyptians and the over 6 million Coptic Christians  in Egypt who are putting their lives on the line. We saw what happened in Lebanon to the Liberal educated Muslim and Christian communities, and know too well how this story is going to turn out if Obama does not intervene politically. Obama threw Mubarak under the bus for far less than what is happening in Egypt at this moment, and there is no way he can remain silent while this continues.

In 2009 tens of thousands of people in Iran put their lives on the line to protest against their government, and President Obama ignored them for 2 weeks while they were slaughtered, finally giving verbal support after the people were already repressed by the military. One would hope that Obama would learn from the “Iranian mistake” and pound his desk at the oppression of true democracy in Egypt. I am not suggesting US military interference on the ground, but I am asking for Obama to demonstrate moral clarity on what he considers American interests: Supporting radical religious regimes  led by dictators that suppress their minorities or the people who want a liberal democracy along the lines of Turkey, which is a model for and Islamic democracy?

First time, shame on Palestinians, second time shame on Israel

The sophistic attempt by the Palestinian Authority to violate the Oslo Accords by achieving non-state status at the U.N. has set the stage for the elimination of the generally accepted pretense by the diplomatic community that a legitimate peace process was ever possible with the Palestinians.  Who was Israel supposed to negotiate this mythical Peace Process - with the Palestinians in the West Bank, or the Palestinians of Gaza?  The Palestinians of Lebanon or the Palestinians in Jordan or Egypt? Until the Palestinians can work out their internal differences, organize pre-state national institutions, accept Israel’s existence and commit to a peaceful solution – they will continue to rely on meaningless ceremonies like their most recent celebration of “statehood”. Firing 1,500 missiles at Israel from Gaza isn't inspiration for the peace process, especially when it comes from territory that the Israel’s gave up in a “land for peace” swap. 

Two simultaneous acts of diplomacy happened on 11/29/12: A meaningless “cyber” Palestinian state was born, and the death of the 1993 Oslo Accords, which was a diplomatic framework for resolving the Israel/Palestinian conflict. It can be debated why the Oslo Accords had not achieved it’s desired goal: Israel’s supporters  contend that it was from a lack of a legitimate partner that wanted peace, or that the Palestinians are  too fragmented to enforce - much less agree on a durable settlement of the issues. The Israelis say that the “pond of peace had been poisoned” by the institutionalization of victimization and anti-Israel (anti-Jew) incitement within the Palestinian educational system and culture. Now, after the 11/29/12 U.N. declaration, Israelis can say that agreements with the Palestinians are meaningless. If they will violate the Oslo Accords, blow up civilian buses in Jerusalem, fire 1500 missiles at Israel – and they are rewarded at the U.N. with an elevated non-state status, I doubt Israel will be in the mood to take ANY RISKS for peace going forward.

The silver lining is that Israel no longer has to operate under the failed diplomatic pretense that there is a peace process to advance. I’m sure that many diplomats assigned the impossible task of keeping the Oslo Accords alive will try to minimize the Palestinian achievement at gaining non-state status, just like they minimized the 1500 Hamas rockets shot at Israel, the 6 Israeli deaths , the thousands terrorized,  or the Jerusalem bus bombing. The Oslo Accords have failed and the reason doesn't matter now. What replaces it will be more realistic, which actually gives hope to those who viewed the entire Oslo Process as an exercise in failed diplomacy from day one.

First time, shame on them, second time shame on you. If anyone is going to have to take a risk for peace going forward, it’s going to have to be the Palestinians, because Israel has learned that there is no atrocity or violation of agreements that the Palestinians will commit - that isn't celebrated in the U.N.